Yesterday, we went to a new spa for a manicure. The reality is the matriarch likes to feel the belle of the ball and the old spa wasn't putting on quite the right show for her; it was a good place, they were kind but the matriarch had become merely a regular and was no longer a star. You wonder how long people want to be in the limelight.
Anyhow, the new spa made a big deal about her age and she felt special. However, the parking lot is not conducive to the blind and certainly not the elderly, blind. This wouldn't have been a problem except the matriarch refused my help with the return navigation to the car. She did not fall but she could have and it would have been her own fault. I offered my arm and she refused it, saying she could find her way to the car. What do you do? I don't think anyone ever realizes they sometimes will need help. I don't know if we ever consciously age in our own minds; the matriarch takes my help for granted and wants it there when she needs it but otherwise she is completely independent. Do you understand the conflict? The matriarch can be as independent as she wants to be but I had better be there for those times when she isn't. I hate being taken for granted this way. And, I honestly don't know if the matriarch considers the situation. She's caught in a paradox--aging but unwilling to be old, even at 98. As I have mentioned before, the matriarch thinks walkers are for old people, not her. Do we ever feel old in our own minds?
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