Why Do I Argue???

My mother-in-law closed all the windows in her room, yesterday, because it was too sunny; it wasn't, we have had non-stop rain.  So, naturally, because I am an idiot, I disagreed with her, said it wasn't sunny and she became annoyed.  Why do I do such things?  Does it matter all that much?  Is it so important for me to be right?  She felt warmth on her face and closed the shutters because she thought it was too hot.  It's November, it was evening, it wasn't sunny.  I wonder why it matters to me so much...The matriarch also lied in a phone call to her sister-in-law about my house being decorated for Christmas; she said I had it lovely with lights and tree cut and decorated.  It's not.  It's still November.  I don't decorate till December; and I can't help but connect the two situations and wonder if my mother-in-law is trying to make the world over in her image, her wants.  I asked her if she really thought the house was decorated or was fibbing for a reason.  She looked at me and said, "It will be nice when it's done..."

Was that a dig at me?  I don't know.  The matriarch has asked me to take her to visit her husband's grave, my husband's father's.  Her sister-in-law went last Sunday; we go next Sunday.  She has never requested before that my husband or I take her to see the grave site.  I hate to think she is so easily influenced by her sister-in-law.  The sister-in-law also has her house already decorated; the woman has no children, is retired and has time on her hands.  Of course, the matriarch wonders why she doesn't come to see her and take for lunch (that's my dig).  It's sad to think, at her age, she is still so dissatisfied with a life she has chosen to live.  She told the sister-in-law she had her room lovely with Christmas lights and, it will look lovely, when she does decorate it.  But, she hasn't decorated, yet, and she hasn't even asked my husband to get her decorations out of the attic.  I wonder if we ever stop lying about the type of people we are verses the people we want to be.  It makes for confusion: is it the dementia talking or is the woman conscious of what she is saying?