The G.P.'s

Well, if I thought the Opthamologist office depressing, the G.P. office was more so.  The matriarch and I went for her check-up and up-date on the eye situation.  Both were duly noted, blood pressure checked, heart rate checked, weight noted and concerns about a sniffle dealt with--the Doctor smiled told the mother-in-law she was in good health and said good-bye.  She was devastated he did not want her to make another appointment.  It was as though she was left hanging.  Old age is not an illness; being very old and in good health is still not a cause to use the health system.  The matriarch has lost her one constant in her social life since she moved in and she is not happy.  The visits to the Doctor were like her social calls. 

We used to do emergency room calls before she moved in; she would call in an anxious voice, usually at two in the morning, saying she did not feel well and could I take her to the hospital?  There, she would astound the nurses with her age and flirt with the Doctor on-call.  But, times have changed and the emergency room staff do not have time to cater to an elderly woman; I do think they would if they could but...

The big concern for the medical establishment and my mother-in-law is quality of life.  The woman is healthy, eats like a horse and goes for walks.  What else can be expected of an almost blind 98 year old?  My husband and I do not believe in Old Age Homes; if my mother-in-law wanted to go to one, we would agree on the condition she could always return home if she wanted.  Sometimes the matriarch has speculated what it would be like: cards, dances, trips, meals not cooked by me.  In the retirement community or neighbourhood in which she used to live, seniors used to whisper about the state of some of the  Old Age Homes in the area; they were regarded with horror no matter the quality.  In some ways, it is degrading to have the state or somewhere private to have to maintain a senior in their last days.  When the matriarch bumps into one of her neighbours at the Swiss Chalet, they are always surprised to hear she is still living with us and still happy to some degree.  Then follows the tragedy of so-and-so who went into the home and their family forgot about them; homes do tend to alleviate a lot of family responsibility.  Anyhow, the matriarch has just gone to bed with a lemon cranberry muffin to put on her nightstand for an early morning snack. I will bring her some fresh water before I go to bed.