Waiting

This blog is supposed to be about living with an old woman who is waiting to die--except she's not waiting, which is a good thing, but, then, all the time she is waiting.  The other night, a niece promised to phone the matriarch at 9; my mother-in-law sat by the phone from 8:30 waiting.  She just sat there and waited for the phone to ring.  The niece phoned, no problems, but the matriarch spent her evening waiting.  On Saturday, my husband told his mother he would take her for her regular luncheon with him; she got up at 6 am and waited for him to take her to lunch.  Lunch.  She spent 6, make it even less 4, hours just sitting there waiting.  She had her shoes on, her purse ready and she waited.  I used to think this was behaviour typical of someone who has nothing better to do but, apparently, this is what my mother-in-law has always been like.  And, it could drive me crazy except there is not a thing I can do about it.  If my mother-in-law has a doctor's appointment at 3 in the afternoon and she gets ready at 6 am, that is her choice.  It makes for some strange instances.  My father has found her at the door waiting to go out and has offered to take her to wherever her appointment may be only to realize it is not for another 3 or 5 hours.  It's not like time can be rushed.  Time can be filled but she chooses to sit there.  We have offered to take her shopping, for a drive, some form of diversionary activity so she is not sitting there but she prefers to sit.  One really doesn't know if I am supposed to justify or excuse her habits.  I keep telling myself they are her habits.  The children seem to take it in stride.  They know if Grandma is sitting by the door, she is going somewhere; they know if I am not dressed, she is not going soon.  This evening, we are going to The Keg for a family dinner with my parents and my husband's cousins and my mother-in-law is upstairs getting ready; it is 9 in the morning.